Forget the Boots, Save the Watches!

I’ve always said that  if you want any Sh*t out of Perry, just squeeze his neck.  And, apparently, Perry has plenty to spare because his campaign trail is so littered, it’s impossible to wade through the enormous piles of manure he leaves behind at every stop.  FORGET THE BOOTS, SAVE THE WATCHES! It’s getting deep around here.

If you’re from Texas, you already know that Rick Perry is crazy.  So crazy, in fact, he’s often referred to as Straight Jacket Perry.  A glimpse into that empty pea brain of his reveals that, not only is this man one brick shy of a load, he is 100% certifiable. Here’s PROOF. Just take a peek at the whopper ideas that made the Think Progress Top 10 Weird List:

— 10. Social Security Is Evil.

—9. Conscription and Wartime Price Controls.

— 8.Medicare is Too Expensive .

— 7. All Bank Regulation Is Unconstitutional.

— 6. Consumer Financial Protection Is Unconstitutional.

— 5. Almost Everything Is Unconstitutional.

— 4. Federal Education Policy Is Unconstitutional.

— 3. Al Gore Is Part Of A Conspiracy To Deny The Existence Of Global Cooling.

— 2. Activist Judges Are a Problem.

—1. The Civil War Was Caused By Slaveowners Trampling On Northern States’ Rights.



The Daily Beast printed a story about Mr. Michelle and it compelled me to share my thoughts. My Gay-Dar pinged the first time I saw a photo of  Marcus. And, as I read the Daily Beast article, my suspicions were somewhat validated (or, at least supported) by the fact that I am  not alone!  

We’ve all heard the clichés: “where there’s smoke there’s fire”and “the guilty dog barks first” which  begs the question is Marcus supressing the urge to live true to his nature by vicariously “curing gays” (sarcasm implied) because of his current locale (the proverbial closet)? 

Here’s the token Seinfeld disclaimer you were waiting for: “not that there’s anything wrong with that.”  I will validate and take ownership of this disclaimer by adding that some of my best friends are gay. And, yes, they were born that way and I LOVE THEM!

The Gay-Dar is a fabulous thing. The ability to hone in on the ever-so- subtle quantum waves of the homosexual pheromone is unprecedented (for those of us who possess a finely tuned instrument.) Moreover, I never lack for fashion, art, or philosophy critiques and, I always have a shopping partner!  All kidding aside, my friends (gay or straight) are the same-equal (not constitutionally, as we all know) but to me, they’re just people, my friends, my family, and of course, human beings. I don’t differentiate. Yes, I do have a Gay-Dar . Does that make me insensitive to the plight of the LGBT community? On the contrary, it helps me recognize potential friends, potential targets of oppression, and potential hypocrites. Is Mr. Michelle gay? The jury is still out, but I’m betting the farm that he is…

For all the closet dwellers out there who feel the need to hide behind ancient doctrines of exclusionary dogma, come out, be loved for who you are, open that bible instead of using it as a coaster: The truth shall set you free, John 8:32.

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